About the same time the governor lifted Vermont’s mask ordinance, my day-old chicks arrived in the mail.
As to be expected, when I opened the box there had been a fatality en route: one chick had died and been trampled by the others. But the hatchery anticipated this eventuality by including an extra chick in my batch. I ordered thirty live chicks and thirty live chicks is what I found in the box; tiny, soft, fluffy, adorable chicks full of curiosity. As I watched those feisty baby birds I thought, This is what it’s like to emerge from one’s shell. While neither tiny nor fluffy, I am full of curiosity as I crack the shell of protective measures that have kept me safe during the pandemic – so far.
Without A Mask
The first time I returned to the public library after the mask ordinance was lifted, however, I was annoyed by the sign, “Masks required to protect the unvaccinated.” I dug into my bag, where I found a rumpled mask. Why did I have to protect the unvaccinated? I wondered. Shouldn’t I be protected from them?
Like my chicks when I lifted them out of their shipping crate, I was curious about the freedom of going out without a mask. The mask had become part of my wardrobe. It didn’t just help protect me from the virus, it protected me from being identified, being known.
At first, I was both anxious without my mask, and giddy to see my friends’ faces. My Shakespeare group met again. This was nothing short of a miracle: I’m the youngest member of this group; all of us qualify for Medicare, yet we’ve survived to gather and read another play. The Writing Circle I facilitate met in person after so many months on zoom. Gradually, I became as comfortable without my mask as I once was with it across my face. And I was thrilled we were able to host the long-postponed wedding reception for a daughter who married last October.
The Postponed Wedding Celebration!
It was a big celebration – not just Ruth & Ian’s nuptials, but also of extended family and friends being together again for the first time in almost two years.
My brothers and sisters-in-law, my nieces, their husbands and their kids were all there. I finally met my newest grand-nephew, already two. Even my elderly aunt and uncle were there. Except for the children under twelve, everyone was vaccinated, the party was outdoors, and it didn’t rain.
Two weeks afterward we celebrated again: no community transmission from the party. For a moment, it seemed as if the pandemic, indeed, was on the wane.
From Field to Freezer
My chicks have grown into meat birds, approaching table weight. In just a few weeks, they will go from field to freezer. And the Delta variant is wreaking havoc, even here in well-vaccinated Vermont. So I’m climbing back into my shell: I’ve resumed wearing my mask inside public spaces, like the library and the grocery store. But if the virus continues to accelerate I expect I’ll resume my reclusive existence, living exclusively at home.
Tim will again assume all the risk, both as a healthcare provider and as the household shopper, picking up what groceries the garden and freezer don’t provide. I will do my part by staying isolated at home, to improve our chances of both staying well. I will return to the library online, to teaching on Zoom and to my beloved writing studio, where I’m now working on my fourth draft of a book-length narrative about learning to hunt deer.
And just as all the king’s horses and all the king’s men couldn’t put Humpty Dumpty together again, I can’t crawl completely back into my shell – or my unintended silence.
With this post, I will again reach out by writing to you, my readers. If you feel so moved, please drop me a line and tell me how you’ve been.
Hi there,
You write so well and I love your stories and sharing….I miss seeing your face.
Congratulations on your daughter’s wedding celebration and family reunion. A true blessing.
I do miss my family, California, New Jersey and Rochester NY..
But accepting what I have to deal with is part of the training and humbleness.
I did get to see my daughter in May and hope I can get her here in February.
Looking forward to you book coming out and love your Blog..
Aylanah ❤ Katz
Thanks for all your kind words, Aylanah. I love, “But accepting what I have to deal with is part of the training and humbleness.” Wise words. All best.
Dropping you a line to let you know that Abe and I are doing well, considering that we are really old chickens (91 and 88)! I asked your husband to give you my regards–he was the hospitalist at Grace Cottage the day I was finally discharged (on wheelchair status) after a month of rehab. Two more weeks of letting the broken pelvis finish healing and now I’m “wicked happy” to be walking again! I want to wish your whole family mazal tov for finally being able to be together to celebrate Ruth’s marriage !
Love your blogs.
Faith
Hi Faith, Glad to hear that you are healed and walking. You are resilient! Thanks for writing. Love to you and Abe.
A great read, thanks Deb! Love seeing the photo of your daughter and new son-in-law. Congrats! Back to my shell as well….
Love this piece! It resonates with me.
It is odd times for us with 3 unvaccinated children. Fingers crossed that our school district here in bucks county, PA will mandate mask before school starts in two weeks, but I’m not holding my breath. 🙁
And we also got chicks – 12 layers ( we lost 1 so down to 11)
Loved reading what you’ve been up too. And congrats to your daughter!
Great to hear from you, Sara! The pandemic has to be extra tough on parents of young children – as if parenting weren’t already tough. But kids are resilient. All best.
Apparently, I’m not the only one whose “shell” included dropping out of blogging! Since we moved to Washington State in January 2020, I knew almost no one but family, and, introvert that I am, didn’t miss socializing until I dared to go grocery shopping with my daughter and suddenly wanted to talk with everyone I saw; the few I approached seemed to feel the same way. Since then I’ve joined a couple of groups–one indoors and masked, the other a writing group gathering at a coffee shop with outdoor tables. I volunteered to help with a community organization working with children, but that’s now postponed on account of Delta. I’ll get my blog going again as soon as the developer finishes remodeling it for me. It’s been years since we had chicks–banties that ran free in our orchard with the side benefit of no black widow spiders in and around the house.
So nice to hear from you! I love “[I] suddenly wanted to talk with everyone I saw”!
It’s been far too long my friend, families have grown and moved on and we’ve lost touch. Way too many changes happening. Nice to hear of Ruth’s marriage. What are your other girls up to?
Hope to hear how everyone is doing and where they are. I have many fond memories of babies in the office
I think of you often. Let’s reconnect.
Hi
Always happy reading your posts
All your stories do paste my mind to tout posts
I’m a french fluent language user
But you’ve somehow influnced me as english user
Not only using the language
But also inspiring me as a writer
Many thanks
May God protect us all
Je vous remercie pour vos aimable paroles.
i agree 100% with your feelings on the sign at the library deb. come on, give me a break.
At least we don’t have to wear masks in the woods!