The “Middle” in middle ages refers to both the growth of one’s middle and being between the generation that spawned you and the one you raised yourself. Attempts to control the growth of one’s waistline is a Sisyphean task that requires eating less, exercising more, and accepting the inevitable force of gravity. As hard as […]
The Middle Ages
Searching for My Keys
If I’m lucky, I might still have a third of my life left in the tank, so I’m annoyed that I squander so much of this time searching for my keys. Whenever I can’t find them, I have painfully memories of laughing at my mother, whose every sortie from wherever she was started with a […]
Hello, Tooth Fairy!
Losing a tooth at age six is exciting; losing one at age sixty is not. At age six, the tooth-gapped smile is a sign of maturity. Those front teeth, once the suspected source of infant irritability, are celebrated as they wiggle free. At six, the improbable saw-toothed permanent teeth emerge into the double-wide gap like […]
Second Adolescence
I confess that for the past few years I’ve fallen into the abyss of vanity and self-doubt the likes of which I hadn’t experienced since the days I believed in the transformative power of blue eye shadow. Now, as then, I’ve taken to scrutinizing my face in the magnifying mirror. Back then, I worried […]
A Baby Boomer Grows Up
The Middle Ages in Europe, beginning with the collapse of the Holy Roman Empire and followed by the invasion of the barbarians, are generally divided into three periods: Early, High and Late. My Middle Ages are progressing in reverse, beginning with the departure of the barbarians, when the kids left the nest, and instead of […]
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